Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
