Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
