I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
