he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
