There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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