Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
