Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
