i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
