She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
