But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
