How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
