she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
