I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
