no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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