At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
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