Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize