Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Randomize
