I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
