I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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