He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
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