I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize