In the future we'll all be gay
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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