lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
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I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
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Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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