So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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