in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
