The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
