Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
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