i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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