so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
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A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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