Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
