I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
