I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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