i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
The ass gains better be worth it
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
