HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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