maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
