NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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