We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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