you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
