and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
