But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
