Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
