And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
