let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
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