First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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