Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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