Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
