what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize