do herpes really smell.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
