what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize