my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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