Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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