I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
